I turned in a paper this week that was very difficult for me to complete. It is not uncommon for me to struggle with some of my papers in seminary over the content or the emotion it elicits from me, but this is the first paper to give me trouble of its kind. The paper was not designed to force me to deal with and work through some of my weaknesses in ministry, but it surely did. I am so glad to finally have gotten that paper finished! This is what was confirmed to me about myself and my ministry:
Doing the Point A and doing the Point B are no problem for me, and I enjoy them. The space in between those points is not part of my strengths. What are those points? I'm glad you asked. Point A is the dreaming or visioning aspect of ministry. Every ministry needs a plan. We must be in tune to what and how God is moving among us and how He desires us to respond and be involved with Him. Dreaming and "casting" a vision is a way that He communicates, at least to me, what He is up to. I can see where He is leading and where He desires us (myself and those I'm with). I love doing that. I love seeing what the Lord is up to! This is Point A.
Point B is about doing, living and loving. Point B is what all the efforts of the dreaming and vision play out. I love getting to know people. I love interacting with them. I love hearing their stories. I love to engage them. I love to connect with them (in spite of my shy nature). Point B is a fantastic place for me to dwell because I love being a part of the process of walking life and being with people.
This paper was completely about the space in between points A and B. The planning, the paperwork, the administration, the organization and the preparation in order to connect these two points. I'm not a fan of it! In fact, I do not even remotely enjoy it. The project was to design and implement a church and community ministry. I loved the dreaming up aspect of the paper. I loved trying to figure out ways to meet people's needs. I loved thinking about the doing of the ministry. Meeting the needs. Walking life with those my "ministry" was going to reach. Unfortunately the paper was all the details in between. About 1-2 pages of the 15 page project was the part that I enjoy. The rest was the space in between.
So what did I learn? Well I do still dislike writing papers, which probably comes as no surprise to you. I also learned that I need to be diligent to surround myself with people who are strong in doing the space in between. Two people that come to mind for me: Jason Dorriety and Bud Harlan. I think the time I was able to serve with both of them was phenomenal because we complemented each other (me with Jason and me with Bud). I am not saying that either of them are weak in the Dreaming/Vision or Doing aspects, I'm just saying that are definitely good at the administrative stuff. I'm so desperately thankful for the Lord's allowing me to work with them in the capacities that I did, and I would LOVE to be able to be teamed with them again in some form or fashion.
So what are your weaknesses in ministry? Who are your compliments? I am definitely NOT saying that this is my only ministerial weakness! I'm sure you could name a few about me yourself, and I can absolutely guarantee that Jason and Bud could write a dissertation on it, with love of course. My point is this paper really made me realize that it is most assuredly important to surround ourselves in ministry with people that compliment us. People that can be strong where we are weak. Hopefully this was something to think about...maybe?
I got much love for you...
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