Tuesday, October 27, 2009


Lately the idea of hope has really been keeping me thinking. I was sharing with a friend, about a week ago, about how I absolutely love the Lord, and the many things He does for me. One of the things He has given me is hope. When I said that, I caught myself off guard, and I have really been thinking about what the idea of hope means...at least what it means to me. Why is it important to me to have hope? What is my hope in or what am I hoping for? How does Jesus give me hope?

Mock me if you must, but I looked up the definition of hope. Here's how Webster's defines it:
hope - to expect with confidence. Hope is expecting something with full confidence that the desire of my hoping will come to be. Hope is what I get to look forward to. Hope is what drives me on days when I don't feel like it. Hope is what is stored up in me and then used as motivation to keep plodding along this journey when I don't feel like I can. I experienced the gravity of hope in my most recent life journey that I have regularly referenced. I can't imagine having tried to walk this season of my life without the Lord and the hope I have in Him. I am utterly baffled how people go through life without this hope. What's my hope in? I hope in the Lord, that He has redeemed me, that I will be with Him and experience His love forever, that my future is in Glory and whatever I go through on earth is worth it in comparison, that He can do the same for others, that He has a specific plan for my life and I'm not just a bumbling idiot, etc. "My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness" (throwback moment). Anyway, I place my hope in Jesus, and THAT HOPE is what drives me in this life. In the good times and bad!

Paul has something to say about this mindset of selling out to Christ and receiving this hope: "If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men." 1 Corinthians 15:19. That means that if, when life is over and I have completely wasted my time believing in and giving my life up for this Jesus and this is all just a feel good story, then I should be pitied more than any other person who has ever journeyed this life. The good news is that this Jesus isn't a feel good story. This Jesus is real. This Jesus is keeping me going and providing hope for my life. I'll spare you what I feel to be a lengthy "sermon" coming on.

Anyway, in my conversation with my friend, I was struck with this thought: What do those who have not experienced Jesus hope for or place their hope in? Money? Family? People? Fame? I was baffled. I CANNOT imagine continuing to live my life without the hope that Jesus provides for me...especially if I was to hope in something other than Him. Every one of those things has failed me before, but the Lord...He never fails. I am grateful.

Hopefully this made sense. Just something to think about, and count your blessings for. I got much love for you...

Friday, October 16, 2009

The Israelites and Me

This week has been crazy busy. I've been doing what I do best: procrastination. This week it caught up with me. I had an Old Testament project due today at 5:00pm, and the professor, as well as those who have had the class before, said to make sure NOT to wait until the week of the due date to start. I waited till the week of to start. Needless to say, this week was nuts. I have been absolutely immersed in the Pentateuch, which is the first five books of the Old Testament. I have been reading about mankind's constant inclination toward sin and away from God, and how God must provide a means of redemption for the people. There is a constant cycle of it. In the midst of my immersion in the study of these people and their relating to God, I found myself absolutely dismayed at their stupidity. How many times is God going to have to shake up their lives to get their attention and focus back on him? I was frustrated at them.

I finished writing last night around 10:30pm and turned on the TV. I recall feeling the frustration of having to write about how dumb the Israelites were, and how it was a constant cycle with them. Minutes later the Holy Spirit was rocking my heart as I realized I had just engaged in sin and needed to repent. As I did so, I was reminded of the fact that my life is EXACTLY like the life of the frustrating Israelites. I had just finished being frustrated with them about their constantly turning their back on the Lord, and then I did the exact same thing. That's lame. I was broken over the way I live my life.

Romans 7:21-25 says, "So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin."

I hate that my life is exactly like the pattern of the Israelites to turn from the Lord. I hate the sin in my life. I hate that. I honestly want no part in sin, and then I found myself, in that moment last night, for example, engaged in that very thing. Lame. I hate the sin in my life.

I have a great sin problem. Thankfully I know a great Savior. Man do I need Him. Thanks be to God! I'm glad He's not finished with me yet.

I got much love for you...

Monday, October 5, 2009

Moses Got Me

Today has largely been a day of reflecting (story of my life the past several weeks). In the reflecting, and my continued pursuit of the Lord and contentment with where I am (see my last post), the Lord brought a verse/passage of scripture to me that owned me.

Exodus 14:14
Moses and the Israelites have JUST gotten out of Egypt. They find out that the Egyptians are now in pursuit of them. The first thing they do is go to Moses and begin to complain. The people who were slaves just a few verses prior were now COMPLAINING about their current circumstances and the fact that things weren't going the way they wanted them to.

Moses response to them owned them, I'm sure, but it very much struck a chord with me because of where I am in life. Exodus 14:14 says, "The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." A very present reminder that I'm not in charge of the future. What I can do right now is just be in tune with the Lord. My pursuit is to continue to get to know, love and grow in knowledge of Him in this time. Not try to figure things out. Not be in control. Not plan. Just be still.

I'm loving that He sent that message to me today.

My posts are getting more regular. Life is coming back to me. He's not finished with me, yet. Much love...

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Wait and See

As is often the case, the Lord is using some song lyrics to communicate some truth into my life.
Brandon Heath lyrics:

"There is hope for me yet
Because God won’t forget
All the plans he’s made for me
I have to wait and see
He’s not finished with me yet

Still wondering why I’m here
Still wrestling with my fear
But oh, He’s up to something
And the farther on I go
I’ve seen enough to know
That I’m, not here for nothing
He’s up to something"
-Wait and See

I have spent a good bit of my life trying to figure out what the Lord is doing in my life, and what's He's doing next for me. Let me clarify: looking ahead is not always bad because we do need to continue to seek where God is leading, but looking ahead must be done in moderation. I spent high school, my time at Auburn, and my time up to this point at seminary solely looking ahead. I have been trying to figure out what the Lord is doing with me, where I will end up, what I will be, who I will be with, etc. In doing so, I have been missing the here and now. I am hoping to be able to graduate next December, and at this point, I have no idea where God will lead me or what He will have me doing. I am getting myself to a point where I am ok with that.

This song serves as a reminder that I need to find contentment in where I am now. Don't push. Don't shove. There is hope for how I end up, and that my time here, as I am, is not wasted. God knows the plans He has for me. There are lessons I need to learn now. There are people I need to invest in now. There are places I need to go now. And so on. God has me here for a reason, and I need to be content in learning and growing as I am. He's up to something.